Worrying Vs. Trusting

I'm not usually one to worry a lot, especially not lose sleep over something. I'm pretty laid back and easy going but I don't usually fret and worry over things. I realize that things are going to work out.

For example, my daughter is starting her Sub-Q IVIG treatments tomorrow and Tina and I are going to learn how to administer them at home. There are some concerns and this is something that I can imagine people worrying about but I'm not. I know God will take care of her and I know everything will work out.

Lately, I've been worrying about something else personal and maybe because it involves me directly and I can imagine a number of different scenarios of how things could play out and I don't trust the people involved, I'm worried. I'm losing sleep over it and I just can't seem to stop thinking about it, especially when I'm laying down to sleep. I just keep turning everything over and over in my head wondering how things are going to work out. It's very possible I have nothing to worry about and it's very possible that I should be worried. I'm really not sure.

I keep telling myself, "God's in control" and "Everything works out to the glory of God" and "All things work together for good to those who trust in Him" and "Trust God, He knows what he's doing" and any other Christian euphemism that we were all taught while growing up. My heart knows I can trust God but my worry gets in the way.

It is easy to trust God when everything is going well or it doesn't involve you. It's easy to encourage others to put their trust and faith in God when it's them that is going through the trial. What's tough is when you're going through your own trial.

I thought today that it's easy for me to trust God. I've done that my entire life. That's what I've been taught. It's what I believe and know deep down know it to be true. I don't get too worried about too many things. Part of it is just my personality.

What occurred to me today is that maybe God needs to remind me and teach me in a personal way that He is in control. Everything could just fall apart and that's ok. I know who my heavenly Father is and I know He loves and cares for me more that I do for my own kids, and that's a lot. Some lessons from God need to be learned first-hand. God had to bring something close and personal into my life to remind me that I can trust Him.

I'll admit that I'm probably not over worrying and maybe losing more sleep but while I'm struggling with that, my thoughts are more on Him. I keep reminding myself of His promises in Scripture that He loves me. He'll never forsake me and that no matter what happens, He'll take care of me. I wouldn't be reminding myself of His promises if I wasn't struggling with worry.

Bringing trials into our lives is God's way of getting us to come to Him. My prayer is asking God for strength and wisdom to go through this and in the process, learning to trust Him more.