Satisfaction

It’s curious that your success at something is what makes you feel a sense of satisfaction. This seems like a no-brainer but I’ll explain what I’m going through. I have a good job, one that pays well, that I’ve loved in the past but currently just hating because I’m not being as successful at the job as I have in the past. I’m a good employee, work hard, do what they ask me to, and do my best but for the past six months or so it feels like pulling teeth to see results from my work and I’m frustrated. I know there are other factors involved in the low productivity but I still take it personally. I’m also looking around and the company environment and I just don’t see any advancement opportunities because we’re not growing. I can’t go to another position because I’d lose pay. I feel stuck and I’m frustrated. It appears that I did not get the job I’ve wanted for so long and now I’m also feeling rejected and discouraged. This was my chance to get into a job that I’m highly qualified for and that has growing potential and I could advance my career but that seems to be fading away.

My satisfaction in myself as a husband and father is affected by my relationship with my wife and kids. If my wife and I have a disagreement or my kids are being disobedient, I feel like a failure, like there’s something wrong with me or I’m lacking some key component to be successful and then I don’t feel satisfied that I’m doing a good job of being a husband and father.

I know that my satisfaction in life should not be tied in with my future job possibilities and how I think it looks right now. I know I should not tie my satisfaction with my wife and kids based on the ups and downs of life and how smooth things are going but sometimes it does. My satisfaction should be in based in my relationship with God and through that am I being the best husband and the best father that I can be? My job satisfaction should be that I’m doing the best job possible regardless what’s going around me but these things are hard.

Unfortunately, my feelings and emotions get in the way of being satisfied with life sometimes and I have to remind myself that God is in control, my wife and kids love me, jobs come and go but I’ll always have a good work ethic, and that in the end I’m looking forward to God saying “well done, thou good and faithful servant.” That will be the ultimate satisfaction.